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Thursday, October 27

pretty ugly.

Had a super fucked up day today. Don't ask me why because i don't feel like elaborating it.
Thanks for the fucked up day!

Everyone seems to have high hopes on me. 
And i'm worry enough that i might disappoint you guys.
Things change.
So do me.
I'm no longer the old me.
Don't expect me to be perfect.
But I promise to try my best.

Monday, October 24

Form 6, survival of the fittest.

Countdown to STPM : 29 days

Fuckmylife, fuckmylife! 
Never have i felt so depressed about anything. Can you believe it? I literally feel like giving up now. Why is it so easy to other people and yet so hard for me? While scrolling through Facebook just now, i realised that alot of my ex tuition mates, although mostly acquaintances, are in Universiti Malaya. And the best part, all their courses are like hardcore ones - Medicine, Accounting, Engineering..

All of a sudden, i feel so inferior. 
Do i wanna enter UM, yes.
Do i wanna do Engineering, yes.
Do i wanna be successful in life, hell YES!

Form 6 is all about survival of the fittest. You never know where you stand. Form 6 is where you experience total extreme scale, where the good ones are really good and the bad ones are really bad. When you belong in between, you are on the losing side already. No one ever pay notice to the runner-ups, need not say those belong in between.

I finally understand the feeling of helplessness. Gosh, so little days left, so much left to revise. I don't wanna screw up my STPM. I definitely don't wanna waste my one and half year in Form 6. I believe in "you reap what you sow". How much i study, that's how good i'm gonna do in exam. And for goodness sake, i ain't sowing much. All i wanna do is to push through the 53 days left. I ask for nothing else.


Saturday, October 1

the perfect 10 month.

Omgosh omgosh! September ended already. So does my trial. But the real STPM is creeping real near O.O
And trial result was bad! =(

What can i do to repair this shit. Only god knows.
Bro is having PMR in 3 days time. Hope i had his enthusiasm in revising. Haih.

Countdown to STPM :: 50 days