Happy 2014.

New year, new me? 

Ain't nobody got time for that.

I will still be me. 

The girl that curses. 

The girl that acts like a guy. 

The girl who don't give a fuck. 

Wanna be friends? :))

Last two years started rather badly for me. You can read about it here. Still too soon to say 2014 started well but at least it started fun. I'm not hoping for 2014 to be great, because I am going to make it amazing, in my way! After all, I'm turning 22 this year. 

Old, I know :(

New year resolution?

Heck, I don't even have any last year. 

No expectation, no disappointment? Lol.

I just want to live well without letting my parents worry and be able to do/achieve what I want! Mind you this is not a new year resolution, more like a lifelong resolution. 

2013 has taught me to never hold back. Go for whatever you desire and when you put in the effort/determination, nothing is impossible. This year, I'm going to be bolder, stronger. I will learn to love myself more. It's about time right? Lol. 

So, happy 2014 folks! Thanks for still reading my not-so-glamorous blog. I certainly hope to blog more this year, which means, more happenings (and more exciting new experiences) hopefully :)

I wish you a splendid beginning and all the best for the new year. Here we go, the 12-month cycle all over again :)

Happy January!

By hooks or by crooks, I will make my dreams come true. 

Life planning starts now.

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What Happened in November.

I hate the fact that I don't blog enough.

I hate the fact that my blog is always half dead.

I hate the fact that I don't have much interesting stuffs to blog. Yeah, life has always been boring.

But to you reading this right now, thank you for coming back.

Thank you for still reading my half dead blog! 

I'm beyond touched. :')

Seriously, recently my life has been revolving around assignments, assignments and more assignments only. So yeah, I even experienced going to the library everyday for one whole week just to finish my assignments. Lecturer gives assignment after assignment as if we got nothing better to do. -.- Life this semester is miserable like that. :( This is only Year 2. Can't imagine/ don't want to imagine about Year 3 or FYP. Haih.

But, amidst all these crazy assignment loads, I'm thankful I managed to dig (very hard) for something to blog. Haha. Pathetic but don't judge me lah.

Although I am busy, very thankful to Brendan for forcing me to go for debate tournaments. Learned alot. And gained alot. I'm happy the debate family grew so close to each other :) Picture taken after WUPID tournament. 

(pls notice Ben, second from the left although he is too dark to be noticed haha)

haha only God knows what went wrong in me until I chose Modern Dance as ko-k this sem. (must be Ferlynne's advice) Surprisingly, it turned out fun and now I cannot explain how phobic I am with Bruno Mars' voice/song. 

first Jazz Band concert. Sorry but I'm the rave party kind of person.

*cues Tiesto*

nevertheless I enjoyed it! Kudos to my friends who performed! 

People who can play musical instrument(s) are so sexy!

Future boyf, please be someone who can play instrument(s). Heh

My bimbo moment. Oops.

Pesta Hoki was one of the highlight this semester.

Can u imagine a bunch of people going to Rapid Penang's depot in the middle of the night to install advertisements? 

Yeap, that's us!

As usual, the selfie with Tiffinny! :D

Duck lips ftw! *sorry not sorry*

Thank you representatives from NP3 and thank you my PR team! :D

Feels amazing to have my 08s reunite once again to do this! Everyone is on a different path  in life (and in different part of the world) now, but I'm sure the 08 spirit is still there in each and everyone of us! I miss you guys so bad!

This actually happened in December for Pesta Hoki's dinner! Haha. Wearing saree has been a great experience. But the process of tying it was hell! Thank you my roommate for helping me with it. U made me look gorgeous that night! ♥

[taken before the saree was properly tied]

Meet my roommate! We have a love-hate relationship. Hate most of the time. Lol

That night. This sem very sad, cuz not much occasion to dress up. Lol

Attention whore alert.

PR teamku yang awesome dan syok sendiri. Pesta Hoki was fun because of you guys! :D

This photo is posted in the honour of my B! Hahaha. 

B if you're reading this, do you miss your BB? Hahahahaha.

Time flies so fast its already December. Can't wait for this semester to be over. 

2013 has been a great year so far. Please be awesome till the very end. 

Till then, 

xoxo.

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Sarawak, the Land of Hornbill.

Its currently 3:45am while I'm writing this. I should be doing assignments but heck, I decided to do what makes me happy. Hence, I'm here blogging! This semester has been too much so I can't bother to care more anymore. Let's just go with the flow and see where it brings me. 

Alright before I spoil this post with all my emo feelings, lets go back to business and yeah, I'm writing about my first ever Borneo trip! (read it in Ryan Higa's "first scene of the day" tone lol) 

Guess what? I finally step foot into the other part of Malaysia! Woohoo, achievement unlocked! What's even better is to go explore with a bunch of people I can go crazy with :D I love Sarawak so much! Those of you that have not been there, go and be impressed with how big the roundabouts are! 

There's basically 3 things I love about Sarawak : the people, the foods and the culture!

Well, the people that I met there are basically from Peninsula but considering the fact that 2 of my debate trainers are from Sarawak, that makes Sarawakians awesome! 

Food wise, Sarawakians are so generous about the servings and the best part of it, NO TAX! You heard read me, no freaking tax! (Except for franchises like KFC, McD -.-) My favourite food has got to be the Sarawak laksa, one of a kind! 

Best part of this whole trip was my visit to the Sarawak Cultural Village. It was truly an eye-opener to me. Feels like, all the history that I learned back in secondary has come to live.

Goodbye Penang and hello Sarawak!

Kuching International Airport.

My dear president, Ferl. lol

USM debaters, ready to have fun!

Tourist moment.

And then it got too much. -.-

Who else other than my B studying in UniMas? :D

Thank you for bringing us around and round and round Kuching :D

Truth be told, we were there on a mission. 

.

.

.

.

.

.

.

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Kidding! 

We were there for a debate competition. The Borneo British Parliamentary Championships (BBPC).

And this is us halfway through the workshop conducted by Logan.

The super veteran debater, Logan!

Gotta love Sharing Cafe for this quirky idea, although we were bummed that there's no wifi.

Ironic but yeah.

After a whole day of debating (adjudicating for me), spent the second night in Kuching with my Klang homies :D

And I finally met Cindy, Sen Chen's bestfriend in UniMas.

Throwing in a picture of one of the debate motions to prove I really went for a debate tournament! Lol

And this was the final round motion of BBPC.

Ling, Chi Kuan, Adrian, yours truly and Jackson! Thats the name Tan and Pang go by in Sarawak lol

How Chi Kuan and Ling know each other is still a mystery. Hmm...

Group photo at Wakakakaka Cafe.

Totally not kidding about the cafe's name.

Just cuz we look awesome in this pic! Hehehe

Us girls, sorry I think I spoiled the picture.

And Isaac dumped us for his friend too. Lol

Picture does not do this serving any justice!

This was enough to feed 3 people!

And this was enough to feed 3-5 people according to the menu.

At the end of this trip, all of us got phobia with western foods hahaha.

Kolo Mee. Too dry and too oily at the same time.

Me don't likey.

Sarawak laksa! Slurps.

My favourite food of all :DDD

Sio bee.

Feels so trolled that sio bee is actually Siu mai in hokkien. And we thought it was some really special local delicacy. Haha. Nevertheless, it was good, just that we were too full to truly savour in something that we can get back in Peninsula.

Seafood dinner with Ivy's family!

This was not even half of the dishes. 

So grateful to Ivy for such a splendid meal.

Thank you Ivy and aunties! :D

Tried on the iban traditional costume for the first time.

The accessories are bloody heavy -.-

Ta-daa!

Love this Friendship Park in the middle of town where people can exercise, walk or even dance regardless of the time of the day.

The last time I saw/visited a park like this was in Korea.

And of course we celebrated Ferl's birthday!

Blessed 22nd. 

Lastly, visited the Chinese Museum near Waterfront and was amazed by the surnames of Chinese.

Can you spot yours?

Lim. Took me awhile to find it.

And that's Lee!

Sarawak has been amazing and I definitely wanna go back for the orang utans and rafflesia! Oh, and I have to visit Miri for Gua Niah/Gunung Mulu. Till then, back to assignments. :((

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Here we go, Kuching!

Whaddup people!

Haha, sorry (I'm not sorry) for the big ass selfie. 

I'm proud to announce, after 21 years living in Malaysia, I'm going to Sarawak! 

Finally stepping my feet into Borneo/East Malaysia for the first time ever.

Achievement unlocked i guess? Lol.

The legit reason is for BBPC Debate Competition in UniMAS. But it also means visiting and travelling!

Woohoo, first trip with university mates too.

Can't wait to see Sen Chen there! xD

I'm too excited to think straight!

Till then! 

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Frustration

Sorry this is just gonna be a long ass angry post. I needed a medium to express my frustration, my anger, my disappointment! Probably I will delete it off few days later. So bare with me.

Life is so out of control I don't even know what I am doing anymore. Is this what I want? Am I doing it right? Is the amount of commitment that I put in sufficient? Apparently not. Today was supposed to be a good, happy day. Turns out to be otherwise.

I don't blame my trainer for pushing me too hard during the training. Yes I admit part of me was angry with him over that. But the bigger part of me is just really disappointed and frustrated with myself for not being able to live up to the expectation.

Stop telling me I'm good. Cuz I know I am not. How to not doubt myself when everyone else is improving while my progress is totally stagnant? I see how the others are progressing while I am not. And when u tell me that you believe I can, it just kills me more because I know I will let you down again.

I hate this feeling.

I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it. I hate it.

I don't even know what I want anymore. Is this the right choice I'm doing?  

Am I really a worthy investment? 

I don't want to let you down. But I know I am not good enough to make you proud yet. 

:(

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